My brother

It is amazing what a single phrase can do!

My brother Harald used to be this lazy couch potato without aim and direction, he spent his days on the sofa watching catoons in the morning, soap operas in the afternoon and sports and tv-shows at night. Looking for script errors like a filmstar getting shot in the left arm in one scene and then having his right arm bandaged in another scene used to be the most productive thing he would ever do.

He seldom shaved or washed or even wore clean clothes, only an old baseball cap from Örlogsberga Båtklubb and a stinky Japanese robe. Sometimes, when his friends came over to play Dungeons & Dragons he would change the cap for a fake viking helmet and call himself Harald the King of Vikings for a couple of hours. Sad but true.


For many years he stayed inside his apartment, hardly ever going outside. In the summer it was too hot and humid outside, during the winter too cold, he argued. He loved to sit in front of his tv. Sometimes when he did not pay his bills and the electricity was cut, he would still sit in front of the black screen and fantasize he was watching funny shows. His physical state of being slowly degenerated and he transformed himself into a pale pile of slow moving lard. I felt sad about my brother´s lack of ambition and low self-esteem, as did the rest of the family.


But one day all changed, I remember it clearly. I uttered a single phrase that made his eyes flicker for a brief moment. I first thought it was a reaction to the commercial being shown on the tv but then I realized he had actually listened to me. His face showed a set of emotions in rapid speed; astonishment, puzzlement, fear, anxiety and then determination.

Suddenly he stood up, took of his robe and cap and went to take a shower. Then he decided to clean the apartment and opened up the windows to let air in, washed clothes, cleaned the floors with soap. I was flabbergasted and could not believe my eyes. What was going on?

Next morning he woke up at 6:00 AM and went jogging for two hours. When he returned he took a quick shower and started to look for a job. Within two weeks he was excercising regularly and had a job as a bicycle messenger. He took a liking for karate and got his black belt within five years. He also started to study and it was clear he had talent for math. Within seven years he got his PhD in Computer Science and started a computer consultancy company called HaraldSoft AB that sold automated PC support over the Internet. Within two years of operation he became the richest Swede in the world, retired, bought a huge house downtown Stockholm and installed the biggest Home Theather system ever seen. Then he closed and locked the doors and nobody has seen him since.

In the beginning I wanted to see that he was alright and stood outside his house for hours but never caught a glimpse of him. Once I tried to enter the house but got zapped by the electric fence and had to stay in a hospital bed for three weeks. In my heart I know he is well and happy though because sometimes when his favourite show is on, Married With Children with Al Bundy, he raises the volume so much that buidlings vibrate and windows shatter.

The phrase that I uttered? I merely told him that "Too bad you are poor and without ambition because now you sit here with just a 29" TV when there are Home Theaters out there with plasma screens and advanced Dolby Pro Logic Surround Systems!".